Thank you so much for your two-sentence rejection e-mail, which I just received today. Considering the relevance of this position to my field of expertise, I have been anxiously awaiting word from you since I applied weeks ago, lumbering nearly daily in Sydney humidity to my PO box, only to find nothing.
In fact, I should have seen your missive coming, presaged by the many others I have already received from arts organisations like yours. Often those rejections comprised an entire five sentences and can be so tiring to read. Your desire for brevity is greatly acknowleged.
I trust you'll understand if I elect not to concoct your triple-sugar caramel mocha soy latte when you come into the coffeeshop at which I'm currently working. But I'll pull a ristretto for you. Like you, I am choosy and in favour of conciseness.